Listen up ladies :

We have got to stop shaming ourselves over a past that might not be sparkly clean.

Who has one of those anyway? I’m not aware of anyone in my small circle.

Many times throughout life, I’ve found myself stuck in a vicious cycle of regret, thinking of all the things I’d done or didn’t do, things I said or didn’t say. It took a huge toll on my self-esteem.

When I looked in the mirror I’d see someone who had a past strewn with stupid choices and impulsive, bad decisions. I felt miserable and worthless and I honestly believed I wasn’t worthy of love. For a long while I let regret define who I was and I how I saw myself.

Regret is pure poison and it will eat you alive.

No more of that shit

You may have a string of messed up, dysfunctional relationships or badly ended marriages.

Forgive yourself.

Maybe you flunked out of college or made a mistake somewhere along the lines in your career.

Forgive yourself.

Maybe you’ve gotten yourself into debt and you have no idea how you’re going to get out.

Forgive yourself.

Maybe you’ve gotten mixed up with drugs or alcohol along the way or been in trouble with the law.

Forgive yourself.

I don’t care whether you have a past paved in bad choices, mistakes and things you’d rather not discuss. You still deserve to live a full, happy life where you give love and are loved in return.

Sure, it’s easy to fall into pity party mode and use your past mistakes as a reason to feel sorry for yourself. I get that. But it’s still no excuse to keep yourself stuck in a mire of regrets with no visible way out. Life is too short!

Right now, from this moment on, just stop.  The pity party will not see you into a successful future and neither will negative behaviors such as drugs or heavy alcohol use. Nothing can be done about what has already happened.

The past is the past and cannot be changed.

The past does not define who you are now.

The past does not define who you will be in the future.

The past is a stepping stone to a better tomorrow.

You aren’t going to get through life without having a few regrets. The problem is when these regrets start to cripple you from living life in the present. When you can’t focus on the here and now because you’re so caught up living in the past and/or fearing the future, you stop yourselves from living a quality life. And that sucks balls.

Reflect and Don’t Repeat

Reflecting on the past and understanding what you did wrong is the first step to help you NOT repeat it all over again. Pinpointing the areas of your life that need improvement will allow you to begin a healing journey of personal development. It all starts with a good, long, hard look at yourself and your short-comings.

During this process however, just don’t let your regrets consume your life and PLEASE don’t let them define you. Understand your wrongdoings and, again, forgive yourself. This.is.key.

Breaking the Cycle

Forgive yourself for being a master at making bad choices. Forgive yourself for being able to locate the biggest asshole in the group and then spending the next 5 years of your life attempting to be the “Asshole whisperer.” (Been there, done that – don’t even want the t-shirt) Forgive yourself for the bad grades, the maxed out credit cards, the tiny little fibs, and the selfish behaviors that begin to make you feel like you’re the worst person in the room. FORGIVE YOURSELF.

You will feel so much better when you can look at yourself in the mirror and not see the pains of regret all over your face. There is simply not enough time in this short life to dedicate to regretting a past you can’t change.

Instead of shrinking back and hiding your true potential isn’t it time to shine like the magical being you are? You gotta own that shit 🙂

You do you. Don’t worry about the imperfect,  judgmental asshat who chooses to point fingers at everyone else. Life is a journey that is meant to be experienced – you only do that by making mistakes and falling down a bit. The problem lies when you choose not to get back up again.

We only have one life – it’s time to start living it regret free 🙂

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From one magical being to another ~ love ya bunches

Kristin